Rakesh Cristoval

Rakesh Cristoval
Gender	Male
Hair	Black
Ethnicity	Indian
Popularity	3rd
Date of Birth	October 2, 1972 (age 44)

"Mother Yucker!" -Rakesh Cristoval

Rakesh Cristoval/Panjeet/Qor/Katahn-Shan Bantu is an Indian male from Bangalore who was born on October 2 (or October 10, depending on the source), 1972. His last name was made in a prank call with an Indian restaurant when a police constable asked for his last name. He first named it Qor, but then changed it to Cristoval. He probably changed it to confuse the police officer. He later stated in the IRS Scam Prank that his last name was Panjeet. This is the prank where he pretends to be a coworker of scam artists in India. He is well known for his prank call with an Angry Indian Restaurant Prank. He is the third-popular character after Buk Lau and Tyrone. Like these two, he is used for calling random people.

Rakesh's occupations range from a stereotypical Indian call center representative to a goat farmer to a worker with the food company Sysco.

Like Abdo, he has a lot of problems with food in restaurants, though he has appeared in many other calls as well. He is mainly used for calling places of service. His most prominent feature is his use of the word "motheryucker" or "mutharyar" or "mother ugly" or a word close to it, and claims that it is not a bad word simply because of the letter substitution. He is also known to react angrily to indian people through this common phrase. He also occasionally uses gibberish sentences (Variants of Hippity Hoppitus) that usually leaves the person he's speaking to silent and confused. "Can I talk to somebody who can tell me about the hoppilly hippity skilly hoppity screen saver?" One of his favorite insults is to call someone a "bhenchod" which translates to "sister f****er" in Hindi. He also tends to use the phrase "not gord/goord" when he is upset about something.

Rakesh is a big fan of the Indian dish Chicken Tikka Masala and always talks about making and eating it. He also uses it as a body part euphemism for penis much like Abdo uses "kaboobies" to refer to cleavage. Rakesh also enjoys eating "hot doggies", particularly from 7/11, even though they tend to make him sick and go "boom boom boom" on the toilet when he gets food poisoning. He is oblivious to the fact that eating "hot doggies" breaks Hindu dietary laws. Rakesh also seems to be a big fan of yoga which keeps him flexible and in shape. He also has an extremely odd goat fetish that is mentioned in several pranks. Rakesh is most likely Hindu but has never stated his religious beliefs in phone calls, unlike Abdo and Tyrone. He also uses a Windows XP Desktop computer, as mentioned in his call to the Windows scammers.

Rakesh wearing the limited edition Hippity Hoppitus t-shirt.

Quotes

• "Mother Yucker"

 Hbitla skilla habdla donut!

• "Mother Yaaaar"
• "Hallo?"
• "Hippity Hoppitus!"

• "Mother Choddar"

• "Doooooooooooooon't talk to me like thaat'"
• Not goord, right?
• Hayamla skillyaaaaaaa hapakala DONUT!
• Let it out Motheryaar, let it out!
• You are my bitch, right nao!
• Ok, give me the kiss.
• "Errdite no'"
• Stop it! Stop it!
• Oooooooooooooooooooooohh!!!!
• Oh my god[s]!
• O my God. O my GooOOooOOooOOooOOd.....
• Aaalright
• ooOOOooOoooOOoooo
• Tanks
• Aryupki!
• Welcome to Stage 2....
• Mimmya Ka Poolya Ka Tapa Killya!!
• M.C. Punjavi
• Do you have a big ballsack like me?
• Ok bhenchode
• Do the gay tings
• 1 Curry tikka masala
• Hippity Hoppitus
• "Crispitus."
• Can I talk to somebody who can tell me abouting...
• YOU WILL SEE THE WRATH OF RAKESH!!